It is hard to see my grandmother aging so. We used to be so silly. We'd talk for hours about nonsense and just giggle. I love spending time with her, but leave wishing for some of those old moments of conversation back. I feel guilty that I don't visit her more often. I want my children to know her as the lady I once knew...how does time slip away so?
Cancer...a word that came up in our life again this week. Since December, I have had one neighbor, one dear friend, and one aunt diagnosed with various types of cancer. Yesterday, I found out another aunt will begin her battle with this terrible disease. I just don't understand...
I'm moving...to third grade, that is. My principal informed me a few weeks ago that I would be moving to third grade. I've come full circle, and will be transitioning back to the grade in which I began my teaching career. Sounds exciting, but I have so many mixed emotions about the move. I will miss my first grade teammates dearly. I am nervous about starting all over again. I am a little intimidated by the curriculum and the state standards. The teacher that I team with will be going with me, along with a kindergarten friend. We are having to hide our enthusiasm to work together, as our school is a very tense place to be right now. My teammate and I were not the only teachers asked to move. Our principal really shook things up a bit by moving two 3rd grade teachers to 5th, one 3rd grade teacher to 4th, one 3rd grade teacher to 2nd, and one 2nd grade teacher to 1st. Not all teachers are accepting this challenge so graciously or gracefully. As a matter of fact, some people are being downright ugly about the changes. Teachers are lashing out, and unfortunately, I have let my feelings get hurt more than once and am becoming more and more paranoid as the days go on. It amazes me the power one (or two) vengeful people can have in swaying peoples perceptions of others...I hate drama, I hate confrontation, and I hate when adults let their emotions outweigh their professionalism. Ahhhh! :(
I move on...I'm so sorry to vent, but I needed to get some of those things off my chest, and any words of wisdom or encouragement would be greatly appreciated!
On to a lighter note...these are the things that keep my mind occupied in the most beautiful ways possible.
Liam at 10 months...hard to believe he's almost 11 months!
Liam is cruising around everything! He loves to hold your fingers and walk. He stood on his own last night for about 5 seconds...won't be long until he becomes a walking fool!
Makayla loves to be outside and loves to blow bubbles.
Feeding the birds...
New landscaping...Seth and I (with a little help from Liam) have added two trees, seven azalea bushes, lots of flowers, and four truck beds of mulch to our yard. I loved to see them all each day as I come and go from the drive.
Liam is our "goofball," and I LOVE it. He can melt your heart and make you laugh out loud with little or no effort. He loves to make you laugh.Other highlights:
*He waves and says, "bye-bye!"
*He also utters his variations of "mama," "dada," "book," "bubble," "sissy," "puppy," and "more."
*He is climbing stairs...LOOK OUT!
*He is very happily feeding himself finger food.
*He gives hugs and SLOPPY kisses.
*He looks right at you and smiles with a mischievious grin when you try to redirect him.
Once again, I love my life and the people who are part of it. I just let my mind get the best of me this evening. I will perk up and I will be happy about it!
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5 comments:
What to say, other than, you know, it's just the way life goes. I don't mean that to sound trite, but the illnesses, the work stress, the joy of your family; it's all part of what makes up our time on the planet. It's the tough things that make the good so much better. You can't control others, you can't even make them better. Example only goes so far, they have to move on their own. You and your team will do great work at 3, you did before. Be sure to check in with Heather, she'll be excited to hear it. I know she appreciated the stuff you gave her when she moved grades.
The kids are something else. When Liam walks, (when the wolves come out of the walls), it's all over.
Take care and push for June
Herb
Darfer-
Such an open and honest post. Thank you for sharing all of that.
First of all, I am so sorry to hear about another aunt facing cancer. It is a horrible reality that you are getting to know all too well.
Your Grandma is such a precious woman. I too have felt those same feelings of regret when I see how my grandparents have aged, and some of the opportunities that were missed. Focus on those silly times though. The times you painted her fingernails, the times you were able to just sit and visit with her. You are loved deeply by her, even though time has changed her from the woman you remember.
You are SO right to find joy in your family and kids. What a beautiful twosome they are. I can't believe how Liam is growing and changing. He is such a happy little boy and truly a joy to your family!
I am thankful for you in my life. I am blessed to know you and my life is enriched by your friendship.
love you!
AMEN!! To the work stuff. It is that time of year. UGH!!! It is awful. I am certain it is intense at your school even more because of everything. I know you taught 3rd before but if you need anything let me know. I have lots of smart board stuff.
Sorry about everything going on around you. I, too, am very close to my grandmother and feel guilty about not seeing her more often. And I'm sorry about work. I really hope things get better.
On a happy note...your two cuties are just too much! Can't wait to see them again!
I can completely understand your emotions related to work! I am hopefully still holding my position as 2nd/3rd grade teacher for next year, so at least we can share lesson plans!! You are an incredible teacher and will do an amazing job at whatever grade you teach!
You are also a great support to those close friends and family members fighting cancer, what a terrible disease!
I love checking in on your blog every now and then to see how your family is doing in good old Harrisonburg! The kids are adorable and are lucky to have such a great mom!
Take care,
Cesca
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